You’re Not A Super Hero

I’ve read a lot of comic books. While there are many different types of comics in a wide array of genres, the bulk of the comic book medium are super heroes, so that’s what most of the comics I read are. In fact I consider myself to be a bit of an expert when it comes to super heroes. Powers, origins, you name it. And there is something very important I have decided; Just because you wear a costume, does not make you a super hero.

The very term “Super hero” comes from the popularity of the very first super hero, Superman. As I talked about before (see here), Superman is the iconic archetype of what a super hero is supposed to be. And to me, the key ingredient of being called a super hero is to have super powers. There is a lot of argument among fans about this fact but to me there is no argument. If you are called a super hero, you need super powers.

This is when I usually start hearing “But what about Batman?” Well, what about him? He doesn’t have super powers so therefore he is not a super hero. He is a costumed vigilante. A costumed vigilante who certainly can hold his own against any of the established super heroes, but he isn’t one of them. I’m sorry but he isn’t. And there is nothing wrong with that. Costumed vigilantes are what all super heroes are to begin with; they just have powers and abilities that give them the qualifier “super”. Personally it’s more impressive to differentiate between the two. A costumed vigilante fighting a super hero and winning is more impressive than two super heroes fighting and one winning.

A lot of this feeling comes from the movie Kick-Ass 2 which is out in theatres as I type this. They call the costumed characters in that movie “super heroes.” None of them are. That’s the point of the movie. These are real world individuals who are trying to emulate the costumed heroics of the four-color funny pages. The point is though that you can’t. Being a super hero is impossible. Being a costumed vigilante however, perfectly plausible.

I say this because there is nothing that depresses me more than the fact that there can never be real super heroes. Even though there are a few infamous individuals who try to emulate the behavior of comic book characters, with colorful costumes and flamboyant names, they’re not super heroes. Even the behavior of these costumed individuals in the real world is not like that of their comic book inspiration. They don’t fight crime, they caution people. They help the homeless. All noble acts, but nothing that resembles a war on crime.

Despite my rants and ramblings, super heroes belong only in the comics and in movies. I may enjoy debating the reality of super powers, the actual idea of such individuals would probably terrify me. The idea of real world super heroes would only cause chaos and confusion, not create the perfect crime free utopias that many geeks think it would. In all likelihood heroes would spend more time as the objects of celebrity than as any sort of hero. Also I am constantly reading stories in the news of excessive force by police, or psychotic mad men going on mass shooting sprees, not to mention foreign and domestic acts of terrorism. Super powers would quadruple the violence of such events and lay waste to our cities.

So to sum up, costume and name does not make a super hero. Powers are what make a super hero. But that’s fine. There are firefighters, police officers, men and women in the armed forces, and average citizens who manage to do heroic deeds on a daily basis. So while you can’t be a super hero, you can still be a hero. And that ain’t half bad.